Baby the Musical

I have really enjoyed listening to my husband's CD of this musical! It is really sweet, sad, funny and poignant. I think you will enjoy it too, read these lyrics and laugh! I just typed them out myself, so there should be tons of spelling mistakes and maybe a wrong line here and there, and most definitely I made NO attempt at punctuation, but my point was to give you a glimpse at a very fun musical that really seems to capture the pregnancy/childbirth experience!

Arlene and Alan in their 40s with three grown children
Nick and Pam in their 30s dealing with infertility
Danny and Lizzie in their early 20s just starting out together


The Opening

In a way it’s a truly romantic story, inside the womb, the ovary floats then once a month it trembles, one single egg is released and the journey begins… (music plays)
Adventure, love and danger lie in wait as the single egg cell travels down the fallopian tube toward the unknown
Meanwhile in the man, the great quest begins. (Deep music builds…)
For all but one disappointment and death lie ahead but for that lucky one there will be a rendezvous!

We Start Today

(Danny and Lizzie)
Stop one moment take it in, can’t you feel the change begin? Don’t you feel the cosmic surge as two lives begin to merge? What a journey what a ride, what a trip to live together, we can make life anything we say.
We start today!

(Arlene and Alan)
Who’d believe how time moves on blink and twenty years have gone, children grown at last we’re free! Life begins at 43. What journey, what a ride, now we’re back to us together! Let’s shape up for all that’s coming our way.
We start today!

(Nick and Pam)
Babies sometimes make you wait, my folks struck out then had eight, but I want this kid for you, Dr. Nick will see us through. What a journey what a ride, “All it takes is relaxation.” I am so relaxed, well then ok,
We start today!

There’s nothing we can’t do together, there’s nothing we can’t have our way, we’re going on like this forever starting today!

Look around it’s in the air, life is changing everywhere! But more fun has come and gone and the journey rushes on. What a journey, what a ride out of March and into April. Then before you’d ever be amazed there comes a day, a year comes a day like this when you have to stop so you will not miss that one more winter that would not end is getting on and around the bend the ivy walls in a college town show a haze of green that once was brown the skies so blue that you never have to pray and the best of life seems only a heart beat away.

Heart beat sound

Hey you look terrible
Oh I guess it’s just the flu
Guess I have a check up too
Yes I’m late don’t ask me how
Yes the doctor will see you now

Look around it’s in the air, life is changing everywhere. One more winter’s come and gone. Who’d believe how life goes on? New beginnings what a ride, what a journey,

A baby? A baby! A baby?? Life goes on!

(Danny and Lizzie)

What Could Be Better


He’ll maybe have my smile and your hair, can’t tell until the baby comes. He’ll maybe have my style and your flair, and play fabulous drums! Just think inside me our genes have found their nitch they link and out will come one tap dance kid with perfect pitch!
What could be better than your own little clone who’ll reproduce all your talents plus a hint of my own consider, this kid will be a one man band if we let her. Your sense of key and my great bravado, your melody and my obbligato that’s what we got oh what could be better than that? Right Danny? Danny? Danny?

I’m thinking I’m picturing my lips and your eyes.
For a boy that’s a perfect pair,
I’m picturing my hips and your thighs, that is very unfair!

No no, I know no one can predict what bird we’ll hatch, whoa whoa whoa whoa, but we’re such genetic gems that God can mix and match!
What could be better than if our little spawn got all his brains from his dad and from his mom got his brawn?!!
Oh funny
Imagine what one tiny mix up could net?!
Your button nose, my bushy eyebrows,
You for the low brow me for the high brow, your brow and my brow.
What could be better than that?

Liz how come?
I was careful I swear and I never forgot it I don’t know how it happened
Maybe it’s just that no barrier on Earth could stand up against the vigorous lashing army of MY SPERM!
That must be it!
Picture a flaying spermatozoon don’t even know just where he is goin’. What’s that ahead a diaphragm screw it, he knows he’s dead, my God he slips through it, suddenly he’s alone in the river now he must seize the chance to deliver, rounding the bend the egg starts to glimmer is this the end of our little swimmer? Catching the tide he sails towards the mystery set to collide and change all of history
What could be better than a family extension a genetic duel a little two part invention, I say consider what we’ll have in hand when we get home Get him your sense of mission my sense of duty your disposition my inner beauty, your intuition my sense of timing, your composition my crazy rhyming hatching a taste that’s really uncanny your little waist my little fanny Lizzie and Danny

What could be better than that?


(Alan and Arlene)

The Plaza Song


It must have been the Plaza
The plaza’s where it has to be, our twentieth anniversary
Good God it must have happened then that means with out a doubt that we did more than just pass out that night we said we’d be like lovers just like when we met an evening we would not forget and fall in love again and again I vowed to love it why have I no memory of it? Champagne wine of bottles of one and two I do recall ordering bottle 3 and 4 I don’t recall at all. All we did for hours was toast the bellhop toast the service God we were so nervous all alone there you and me.
We tried to hide I guess we tried to hide too much so scared to face each other after more than twenty years could we after twenty be more than dad and mother? Its good to try one must never let the fire go out. Yes it was the right idea, except I’m PREGNANT!
So that’s what we did at the plaza?! Can it be I’m really pregnant? That night we gave it our best shot. Oh My Gods it’s really me that’s pregnant. Maybe it’s a sign we’ve won. One more daughter three was plenty! I’ll be sixty when she’s twenty. Good guys never fail. The smell of laundry hampers. Those who try prevail, the heap of squishy of pampers. When two people care enough their marriage can’t grow stale!

Baby, Baby, Baby

Baby baby baby listen to your papa hey there pretty baby better hurry and get here!
Baby baby baby, see your pretty mama don’t you know the minute that you get your foot set her you’re gonna be loved! You’re gonna be held you’re gonna be kissed you’re gonna feel warm you’re gonna feel fine oh what I got handy silver spoons and candy
Baby baby baby Lord how you are wanted I got all this loved dressed up with no place to go whoa whoa whoa
Baby baby baby gonna love you so!

My family always joked about the boy that they got, and though we laughed I always kind of believed it. Then I met you and found that boy I was not set out to be a girl and almost achieved it, but to confirm that this was truly my lot I need one thing more and now I’ve conceived it, so I’ve got to say this sit still you’re gonna hear it, I said I’d pay you back you see for all the life you give to me, what better present look at me, I’m gonna bring my baby back home!

Baby baby baby it’s your captain speaking here’s the first announcement that I want in your ears here your gonna be loved your gonna be bounced your gonna be poked your gonna be oooowwed your gonna be awed lotions for your body grammas who go daudy, nurses who put you on your solid silver potty yeah baby baby baby see how you have changed us, nothing stays the same once become ma and pa waa waa waa, Baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby bbbbbbbbb gonna love you love you love you love you so

(Women)

I Want It All

For a whole lot of years you might say that I’ve been expecting, but I always made sure that I didn’t expect too much. I sat around on my potential and now that I have heard this news, it’s released all these possibilities and all I’ve got to do is choose.

I want it all! I want it all!

I want the whole female experience in a bowl, I want morning sickness and the elation, I want every known female sensation. I want be Scarlet O’Hara, Joan of Arc, Lauren Bacall I want it all!

I’ve been sitting here making decisions just like you have just like you have so the thing that I did was to make myself a list. I put what I want on this side and what I don’t want over here. It was quite a bought but I worked it out and now the answers very clear!

I want it all! I want it all!

I want adventure, love, career, kids large and small I want it all
I want a quiet simple life and some glory. And Steven Speilberg filming my first story.
I want to be Gloria Steinem, Janice Joplin Annie Hall
I want to be Katherine Hepburn, Connie Chung, Madame gostall,
I want to be mother Theresa sally Raphael see I want it all!

Oh no my friends there’s no two ways to slice it, you must chose my friends and there are things you gain but some you lose my friends. Some truly love things
Like what
Like an overtone of romance, an element of surprise the things any grown up practical woman gives up if she’s wise
I want it all! I want it all! If there’s a rise up to the heights and then a fall. I want it all. Don’t try to tell me that I can’t have my drother I’ll be a mother Who is also a Motha I want to know that I can find inside me anyone I need. I want to be Donna makegney Donna summer Donna reed I want a be a Margaret sager, Margaret Thatcher Margaret meed. I want it all I want it all
I want to find a way to break through every wall
I want Tahiti, I want a Grammy, I want stretch marks
I want a pedicure, I want dill pickles, I want a Lear jet
I want a string bikini, I want a Nobel prize
I want to make totem poles out of fruit cans
I want it all I want it all I want it all I want it all!
I could get into this!
(men)
At Night She Comes Home To Me

They want it all! They need it all, but damn it all they have it all.
So let her reach let her race let her be what she has to be
Give her air, give her space, she deserves to be all that she could be
When she flies there is no one to match her. When she falls be the net that will catch her.
She can fly it’s alright cause at night she comes home to me.
She has looks. She has moves and a body that sets me free. Every move simply proves she is all that a woman should be. She’s the type who’d inspire some poet so how come she alone doesn’t know it. Still at home late at night, there’s a woman I make her see. What is wrong we make right when at night she comes home to me.

I died my hair blue for a punk group and people said that’s nice. I put on some bright green eye shadow once not one friend looked twice. I walk into class with a nail through my nose and people’d say how chic. Then I say with a kid you get married and people say what a freak! What’s going on here?

Let her reach let her race let her be what she has to be.
She’s all a composer’s woman ought to be
I don’t care give her space she deserves to be all she could be
She tells me she’s pregnant but she wants me to be free
When she flies there is no one to match her.
She’s making no demands
When she falls I’m the net that will catch her.
Wants my life in my hands
Yes at home there’s a woman I make her see
I’m not gonna let her get away with this
What is wrong we make right when at night she comes home to me
Life is crazy… What’s going on here?

(men)
Fatherhood Blues

Look at me a part of my life is through oo ooh ooh I’m twenty one and I’ll soon be a father too oo oh oh oh whoa my burdens start to grow oo the fun I used to know oh I’m watching slip away, but my head is high and the air is sweet and the street will not stay under my feet. I walk along to a funky beat wherever I go I’m happy, starting now I’m paying my dues but instead of singing the blues, I’m happy

Look at me a part of me feels like you oo except my back is out and I’m really not 22 oo oo oo oo oh oh my kids are grown and so oo I should be through but no oo a fourth ones on the way!
But my head is high and the air is sweet and the street will not stay under my feet. I walk along to a funky beat wherever I go I’m happy
I feel young with nothing to lose when you’ve got the fatherhood blues you’re happy!

Did you think life was sweeter than honey, did you think you had plenty of money now your gonna have a kid well sonny kiss it all good bye
China plates did you think about keeping? Sporty cars did you dream about beeping?
Sunday mornings did you enjoy sleeping? Kid don’t even try!
So you give up some things that you want sure each of them is gonna need orthadonture any junk that the monsters will want you’re gonna have to buy!
But your head is high and the air is sweet and the street will not stay under your feet. You walk along to a funky beat wherever you go your happy
My head is high and the air is sweet and the street will not stay under my feet. I walk along to a funky beat wherever I go I’m happy
Deep in debt and holes in your shoes but you’ve got the Fatherhood blues you’re happy

A guy whose 48 can do it, a kid who couldn’t wait can do it, bums can do it, boobs can do it, jerks and God knows who, my six brothers once a week can do it, couples who hardly ever speak can do it, fools can do it, freaks can do it, what’s so hard to do? Little guys without any hair guys who need a map to know where even guys who don’t even care come through they do well no one tells me I can’t do it too!

My head’ll be high, when my kid and I, we’ll walk along to a funky beat, wherever we go feel happy
My head is high and the air is sweet and the street will not stay under my feet. I walk along to a funky beat wherever I go I’m happy
Why this joy? I haven’t a clue! For an act I hardly recall why do I feel ten feet tall?
When my burdens go and my heart is high and the world I know I kiss good bye and my youth is gone and I touch the sky and I’m feeling great and I don’t know why
That’s the Fatherhood blues!
(Nick and Pam)

Romance

On the 9th, 11th, 13th, 15th, and 17th, when there’s madness in the air, its nice to know that we will share a rendezvous, we kick off our shoes, not a second dare we lose, tonight we won’t turn on the news oh not us my love, its time to share three minutes of
Romance, romance the one thing without which life isn’t worth living you know don’t you the beating heart the joy unchecked the love that somehow leaves the bedroom wrecked we’ve searched and we’re here at last drinking our fill I’m in your hands do what you will
Romance
(Danny)

I Chose Right

As I leave my single life behind thoughts are kind of spinning in my mind. First I think about you, then I think about me loving you then I think about you and me deciding we can be one. It’s crazy I know I wrestled with my pillow all last night then I look at you and I know I chose right. Life’s a very long road and the crossroads come up right away. And it’s sure hard to know which way to go when you’ve barely begun and oh the road you leave behind can shine so bright then I look at you and I know I chose right.
Now maybe we don’t mean that much you and I and maybe our balloon will never fly
And maybe no one cares if we let things go bye and maybe it doesn’t matter if we live or die, but if I‘m making promises to you today I want to know I’ll keep them all the way, so if I’ve not been good at meaning what I say its time now to try so I think about you and I think about me loving you and I think of my friends who say their in love when their just having fun, but I say no, no, no, If I am gonna love its with all my might and I will be true I will follow this through then I look at you.
And I know I chose right
(Lizzie)

The Story Goes On

So this is the tale my mother told me that tale that was much too dull to hold me and this is the surge and the rush she said would show, our story goes on. I was young I forgot that things out grew me. My goal was the kick that life would give me. And now I joke something moves to let me know our story goes on and all these things I feel and more my mother’s mother felt and hers before. A chain of life begun upon the shore of some dark sea has reached me and now I can see the chain extending my child is next in a line that has no ending and here am I full of life her child will feel when I long gone and thus it is our story goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.

And all these things I feel and more my mothers mother felt and hers before a chain of life begun upon the shore of some primordial sea has stretched through time to reach to me and now I can see the chain extending my child is next in a line that has no ending and here am I feeling the life her child will feel when I’m long gone yes all that was is part of me as I am part of what’s to be and thus it is our story goes on and on and on and on and on.

(Lizzie and town’s women)
The Ladies Singing Their Song

I go walking and at once their stalking me, the ladies singing there song my kid’s showing starts the record going of the ladies singing their song. Strangers acting like they’ve always known me, they poke me they stroke me, they treat me like they own me. And their all set to bend my ear the afternoon long the ladies singing their song.

“The way that you look I’d say that its your first my dear I bet that you feel so proud that you could burst my dear now as for me I couldn’t wait to feel again what I felt then so I have ten! My first kid simply popped out like a cork my dear. The next they couldn’t pry out with a fork my dear. My third was twins, my fourth I don’t remember oh no that came first the twins came in September.”

I try riding but there’s just no hiding from the ladies singing their song. My ballooning only brings more crooning from the ladies singing their song.

“My kin were rugged pioneers my hardship they were steeled When grandma had my mama she just squatted in a field. When I learned I was pregnant didn’t want no modern fuss. So I didn’t count and dropped my kid in the backseat of a bus. The natural way you can’t afford to miss the natural way just bite the cord like this!”

Each one desperate for someone to collar, they jolt me revolt me so helpful I could holler

“Forty-one hours in labor how I farted and I swore. Don’t laugh don’t laugh its true. You think that’s bad they tell me that I screamed for forty four! There is no moment in life that’s rougher but when you’re through you’ll be then much tougher you have a road to fulfill it’s Gods will that a woman must suffer. Pain the thing that I can’t stand is pain I told the doctor ‘put me out’”

First one then there’s another coming along. The ladies, and here’s the message that is so strong, the ladies seems I do everything all wrong,
The ladies, how can I ever share these feelings? Where are the words I could employ? No one but me will know my fear for the terrible, unbearable, unsharable joy.

I’m back walking and again I’m talking to the ladies singing their song. Their eyes glisten so of course I listen to the ladies singing their song. Each one worse then the ones that came before ‘em, they clutch me they touch me I wish I could ignore ‘em but we both know that soon I’m gonna be in the throng of the ladies singing their song!!


(Arlene)

Patterns

Patterns in my life that I trace every day. Patterns as I say the things that I always say. Patterns in the ceiling as I lie awake, why are patterns haunting every move I make. Just look here I am on cue again. Upset feeling torn in two again Afraid saying “I’m Ok” making little jokes ’til I run way again, and yet today I am not the same I feel my life slipping from its frame strange feelings rise feelings with no name and I can’t face so I shake them hard roll them up tuck them safely away again.

Patterns that begin as I walk through a door, patterns in the curtains and the kitchen floor. Patterns in the day’s routines I must arrange. Patterns in the ways I try but never change. Just look as I’m thrown a curve again, I leap then I lose my nerve again. In tears running home I go secretly relieved safe with what I know again and yet I know I am not the same inside my heart is something I can’t tame I feel my life bursting into flame and I must change or else I’ll break apart or break away and end up having to start again.
Patterns through the day I seem to use to give my life a shape patterns through the house that give me comfort when I need escape patterns that leave me no break at all.



(Nick and Pam)

Romance II

On the 9th, 11th, 13th, 15th, and 17th, at eleven on the dot whether we’re enthused or not we rendezvous. Down the hall I speed
Time again to plant your seed, I start to think I’d rather read.
But no your troubadour arrives to sing and bring you more Romance
Romance is this what we dreamed of that night in Nantucket, when that summer moon shimmered white above the trees
Stars were dancing in the pleades
We promised I’d be your queen
I’d be your Turk
How could such love be so much work
Romance Romance



(Alan)

Easy To Love

Children tell you everything and give you their whole heart
Your wife tells you every thing and blows your day apart
Maybe that’s the reason why a child is from the start
Easier to love so much easier to love
Children ask you questions and they don’t know if the answer’s true
Your wife asks you questions she already knows the answers to
No surprise the children are no matter what they put you through
Easier to love so much easier to love
Anything a child needs a kiss can make alright
Your wife needs your life
Children want to hear the same story everynight
Try that on your wife
Children open up wide eyes and see you as a star
Your wife opens up wide eyes and sees you as you are
That’s why from the day they got here, my kids were by far easier to love
So much easier to love so much easier to love so much easier easier to love



(Nick and Pam)

Romance III

On the 9th, 11th, 13th, 15th, and 17th, on those fertilest of nights adorned with myrtle for the rights we rendezvous drums pound in my head I start to feel the usual dread, I mount the alter of my bed and lie back warm as ice prepared once more to sacrifice.

Romance romance oh where is the passion I dimly remember please remind me now I loved you I know I did before we were machines to make a kid I’m sorry I should transcend. I shouldn’t preach once more my dear friend into the breach.

Romance Romance when God thought up sex one suspects he was joking. Why else would he make human hearts a powder keg to get one lousy sperm to reach an egg its mad that’s what he did that’s why I’m me reaching for you longing to be swept off my feet ravished or worst head over heals not the reverse I have to feel I can’t just breed please understand we simply need…

We’re not doing this anymore.


(Danny and Lizzie)

Two people in love

I’m having a vision I seldomly see it, the magnity of two people in love how could I have missed it, it had to have been there, I needed you to show me we have so much power that’s locked inside of us every time I touch you it flows the energy of capacity of the infinite sweet of two people in love.

Our scale is enormous our size is gigantic there’s nothing our minds can not contain no walls can enclose us, our lives have no boundaries if we can unleash what’s in us that’s why its alright that we fuse together we know what the universe knows

The potency of vitality of immensity of intensity of the great quantum leap of two people in love, in love.

My God it’s so scary you think I’m not frightened this cosmic invader’s on his way. Look at our apartment, he’s already changed it and he isn’t here yet but we will be saved by the laws of science Einstein proved what everyone knows when two separate lives are fused into one, the energy freed surpasses the sun and we fill the universe we are two people in love, in love!

(Nick and Pam)

With You

I said I’d fill my life with you one look and what else could I do? That smile that lights your face washed into every secret place and made me see a better me inside of me and when a gift like that comes through, I ought to thank my stars forever and so I’ll stay with you and fill each day with you and always know that I’m complete in every way with you.

I said I’d fill my life with you one look and what else could I do? It only took one touch and somehow you unlocked so much it made me see a stronger me inside of me and when a gift like that comes through, I have to thank my stars forever and so I’ll stay with you and fill each day with you and always know that I’m complete in every way with you.

I know I’ll fill my life with you.

(Alan and Arlene)

And What If We Had Loved Like That?


You and me the perfect pair no one question who would dare, others claim but they burned out, we kept rolling along, so its hard to say what happened to us since nothing really went wrong, we know the words but we’ve forgotten the song, and now I’m asking if I love you, what does it matter that I love you? Whatever way it was that I loved you, it wasn’t enough to get us the whole way through, I never simply said that I need you, I never told you when you hurt how I cry, some people fear to risk the flack and never hold their feelings back and what if we had loved like that you and I?

Off we set our minds ensure dreams computed loans secured others floundered had no plan, our direction was clear, and the fact that leaves me so astonished is never once did we fear. The road was straight and true that brought us here

And now I’m asking if I loved you what does it matter that I loved you whatever way it was that I loved you it wasn’t enough to get us the whole way through, I never asked for what I needed or let you see my famous strengths it was a lie some people get beyond the fear and really talk and really hear, and what if we had loved like that you and I?

Some people kiss their restraint good bye and really let the dishes fly and really laugh and really cry and now I’m asking if I love you its good to ask how much I love you. Further I always thought I loved you a love that’s the stuff to get us the whole way through, I never filled the room with rose or hired a plane to write your name across the sky, some people take things to the brink some people feel and later think I’d trade the comforts that we bought if only once we really fought, yes maybe still we’d not survive but we’d at least have been alive we could have really been alive, you and I

And what if we could love like that?
The Birth

For nine months the womb has been the baby’s universe now it begins to crack the baby starts to move, to where it has no idea, all it perceives is that the time has come to leave this safe place and journey into the unknown

Liz, Liz?
Stop one moment take it in
This is rather frightening
We could make big fools of ourselves
That would be nice
Can’t you feel the change begin?
I’m ready, you ready kid? I’m ready
I hope this baby is ready for us
One more season’s come and gone
It won’t be easy it will take years
I can’t believe how life goes on
But I’ve heard that a couple with a sense of humor
Let her in, that’s one thing I’ve got!
As two parents we’re together well get through
What if he doesn’t like me?
What a journey what a ride what a trip to take together we can make life anything we say
I can’t promise to we could go back to the plaza
Over my dead body
All these things I feel and more, my mother’s mother felt and hers before a chain of life begun upon the shore of some dark sea a stretch through time to reach to me and


(sound of a baby crying)

And all that was is part of me as I am part of what’s to be, and thus it is our story goes on and on and on and on….